"My Birthday" a post by Jason Voorhees
Hello everyone, it's that time of the year again. My birthday is two days away and as of this Tuesday I'll be turning 60. Wow I remember when I thought turing 40 was going to be bad. I was depressed and kind of suicidal. My mom was dead, I have no idea who my dad is, My skin is literally falling off my face all the girls screamed when they saw me. I don't know. In a way I guess turning 60 is easier because I'm over all that.
A good thing is , unlike when I turned 40, I am not a virgin anymore. You can go to my myspace page to read more about this.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=72869544
Long story short I fell in love. We went for a walk along the lake, we made sweet love and than I took her head and smashed it into a rock. It was instinct. I miss her. Well that's life.
I tried having a few birthday parties down here at the lake. Usually when my guests arrive it turns out to be a massacre. I can't help but to kill everyone. I have some serious issues. I also remember a time there was a surprise birthday party planned for me. I didn't realize what was going on. They saw me coming and turned off the lights so everyone could hide. I thought they were just campers so while they were hiding I snuck up behind each person and killed them one by one. No one knew I was even there. But the joke was on me when the sun came up and I saw the decorations that read Happy birthday Jason. I screw everything up.
A word to the wise. Stay away from me on my birthday. I'll just be sitting on the docks by myself just waiting for someone to kill. That's all I do. My life sucks.
There
Dude I know a guy who deserves to be knocked around on your birthday!!!! His name is Jus TAN!!!!! Do it Jason!!! C'mon there's a bus load of horny teenagers to slay if you get 'er done!!!!