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My Dad

My Dad left my family about 4 years ago. No one has seen or heard from him. The only way I know he's alive is that every birthday and Christmas he sends me a card with a 100 dollar money order in it. He never leaves a return address on the envelopes.

Recently it has come to my attention that a credit card my dad got in both our names when I turned 18 hasn't been paid in a few months. Thats annoying seeing since theres over 3000 dollars on it and it has been sent to a collection agency. I only found this out because Mollye did credit reports under both our names and it would appear that this is the only bad credit aI have in my name.

So my birthday was last week and I hadn't recieved a card. As a result I got a little worried. Was my dad dead? Did something happen to him? But low and behold today it arrived with 100 dollars. Maybe I'll put it towards this credit card I havent seen in 9 years.

I dont want to get too personal but I will say that my parents both destroyed there marriage. It's just too bad my dad thought the only way out was to run away and not face his demons. My father also had a habit of getting me in debt by forging my signatures to loans I didnt know existed. Even though I don't have alot of good memory's with my dad, In fact I found myself trying to stay away from him and his moods, I do still miss him and love him.

My parents stayed together my whole life so my brother and I could live a happy healthy life. Believe me when I say my brother and myself's life would have been alot happier if they had gotten a divorce. Last time I saw him he wasn't a very thin and healthy man. Sometimes I picture him somewhere really sad realizing he's made a horrible mistake just walking out. I was going to post a picture of my card he sent me. It's one of those sappy hallmark ones that are suppose to express how you feel. At the bottom he wrote Love Dad. I think I will just keep this to myself.

I think to myself, sometimes once a day, that maybe I'll recieve a phone call telling me he's died. I dread that day. Im not sure how I'd feel. I might feel crazy if that makes sense. I just want to see him at least one more time. Maybe not so much for myself, but I think him seeing me would probably make his day.

There